Step by step ...little one .

Its exciting watching children grow. In fact its a thing of joy !

I remember vividly the day my daughter took her first steps, we had just come back from the hospital where we had taken her for her 9th month immunization. She just stood up and after a few faltering steps ,yes !she took off ! It was just unbelievable.

Everyday, every month your baby will achieve something new. From growing their first tooth, sitting down, to crawling and so on. You will be amazed at the rapid changes that will take place in her first year.

I have added a chart here from the Baby Centre website:https://www.babycentre.co.uk/, showing various milestones at each month. You can check it out , there is loads of information in there.

Please take note that this is a guide on what to expect or look out for. Children are different and attain milestones at different paces.

I have twin boys, and at 6 months, the younger twin had grown a tooth, but the older one had not. 

Also, at the same 6 months the older twin had started crawling around the house, but the younger one had not. Amazing, isn't it ?

 

So do not panic, except in extreme cases, then you may need to seek the advise of a Pediatrician. Follow your instincts always.

For example , I read the story of a popular musician, who was born blind .
The mother said she felt there was something wrong when at a particular stage of his development, if she smiled at him, he would not react or show any sign of seeing her smile.
So, she took him to see a doctor and was told he was blind. At that stage, it was actually too late for anything to be done. But he is a very successful and popular musician today actually.

So , here we are :

Mastered Skills (most children can do)	Emerging Skills (half of children can do)	Advanced Skills (a few children can do)
Child's Age : One month
• Lifts head • Responds to sound • Stares at faces	• Follows objects • Ooohs and ahhs • Can see black-and-white patterns	• Smiles • Laughs • Holds head at 45-degree angle
Child's Age : Two months
• Vocalises sounds - gurgling and cooing • Follows objects • Holds head up for short periods	• Smiles responsively, laughs • Holds head at 45-degree angle • Movements become smoother	• Holds head steady • Bears weight on legs • May lift head and shoulder (mini-pushup)
Child's Age : Three months
• Laughs • Holds head steady • Recognises your face and scent	• Squeals, gurgles, coos • Recognises your voice • Does mini-pushups	• Turns towards loud sounds • Can bring hands together and may bat at toys • Can roll over
Child's Age : Four months
• Holds head up steadily • Can bear weight on legs • Coos when you talk to him	• Can grasp a toy • Reaches out for objects • Can roll over	• Imitates speech sounds - baba, dada • May cut first tooth
Child's Age : Five months
• Can distinguish between bold colours • Can roll over • Amuses himself by playing with hands and feet	• Turns towards new sounds • Recognises own name • May be ready for solids.	• May sit momentarily without support • Mouths objects • Stranger anxiety may begin
Child's Age : Six months
• Turns towards sounds and voices • Imitates sounds, blows bubbles • Rolls in both directions	• Reaches for objects and mouths them • Sits without support • Is ready for solids	• May lunge forward or start crawling • May jabber or combine syllables • May drag object towards himself

This is for the first 6 months, can you identify any of these milestones ?

Some parents actually try to keep a record of when their babies achieved some major milestones. You could try that .. It may come in useful during a visit to the doctor.

After the first 6 months, babies become a little bit independent, just a little. At least they can stay on their own playing with their toys while you get a few things done. However, be watchful because it gets riskier. My rule is, the more active a baby becomes, the more watchful and alert you have to be. Go through the chart again and you will know why.

This next chart is for the next 6 months , I am actually watching and following this chart :

Mastered Skills (Most children can do)	Emerging Skills (Half of children can do)	Advanced Skills (A few children can do)
Child's Age : seven months
• Sits without support • Reaches for things with a sweeping motion • Imitates speech sounds (babbles)	• Combines syllables into wordlike sounds • Begins to crawl or lunges forward	• Stands while holding onto something • Waves goodbye • Bangs objects together
Child's Age : eight months
• Says "dada" and "mama" to both parents (isn't specific) • Begins to crawl • Passes object from hand to hand	• Stands while holding onto something • Crawls well • Points at objects	• Pulls self to standing position, cruises around furniture while holding on • Picks things up with thumb-finger "pincer" grasp • Indicates wants with gestures
Child's Age : nine months
• Combines syllables into wordlike sounds • Stands while holding onto something	• Uses pincer grasp to pick up objects • Cruises while holding onto furniture • Bangs objects together	• Plays patty cake • Says "dada" and "mama" to the right parent (is specific)
Child's Age : 10 months
• Waves goodbye • Picks things up with pincer grasp • Crawls well • Cruises	• Says "dada" and "mama" to the right parent (is specific) • Responds to name and understands "no" • Indicates wants with gestures	• Drinks from a cup • Stands alone for a couple of seconds • Puts objects into a container
Child's Age : 11 months
• Says "dada" and "mama" to the right parent (is specific) • Plays patty-cake • Stands alone for a couple of seconds	• Imitates others' activities • Puts objects into a container • Understands simple instructions	• Drinks from a cup • Says one word besides "mama" and "dada" • Stoops from standing position
Child's Age : 12 months
• Imitates others' activities • Jabbers wordlike sounds • Indicates wants with gestures	• Says one word besides "mama" and "dada" • Takes a few steps • Understands and responds to simple instructions	• Scribbles with crayon • Walks well • Says two words besides "mama" and "dada"

 As I said earlier, some children are fast and would probably attain a lot of these milestones earlier. While some are late bloomers and take their time .

Just be watchful, vigilant and watch out for any unusual signs.

It is an exciting journey  ! So, have fun...

Congratulations ! Welcome to the world !

At last ,you are holding your bundle of joy in your hands. The messages start going out to everybody, friends, family, the neighbors  etc. etc.

I want to tell you, your life has changed forever. Don't panic because its for good though.

Becoming a parent comes with a mixture of different feelings, excitement, fear, anxiety almost all at once.
Where do I start from ? what do I do next ?

My advice? Just relax , take a deep breath and go one day at a time.

Breastfeeding
For every new mum who feels capable and is up to it, the first and most important function your will perform, is attempting to breastfeed your baby.

If you had a Cesarean section, this may not happen immediately as you will be in recovery for a while. Give yourself some time.
Various studies have advised that breastmilk is the best food for your baby.

It is the healthiest way to feed your baby, because you do not need to worry about sterilized bottles and all. It comes straight from nature and is at the right  temperature, so you don't even need to worry if its too cold or too hot .
The World health organization has recommended that babies are exclusively breastfed for the first 6 months. They also recommend that the breastfeeding
continues even after babies have started taking solids, until the end of the first year ,or beyond if the mother wishes. Checkout their page here for more information  https://www.who.int/health-topics/breastfeeding#tab=tab_1
Breastmilk is complete. And asides all the great benefits breastfeeding helps to build a special bond between you and your baby.

Bottle feeding your baby also creates a bond. If you are unable to breastfeed all through please do not be discouraged at all.

How do I start breastfeeding?
Pick a comfortable place for breastfeeding. It may be a particular chair ,just make yourself very comfortable, as this is not a function that should be
rushed or carried out in an unrelaxed manner. You just have to be relaxed.
Sitting-upright in an armchair or rocking chair is the easiest position for breastfeeding.
You can also sit up in bed, but make sure that your back, shoulders, and knees are well-supported.
The atmosphere is important, especially in the early days of breastfeeding when you're still trying to get the hang of it.
If you tend to get bored, you may want to feed with the television on watching your favorite show, this way you won't be feeling you have spent so much time. Try different spots until you find what works for you.
Hold your baby in a position that won't make your arms and back ache. Have cushions or pillows to support your baby. Many mums find cradling their baby
across their chest, raised up on a cushion or pillow, works well. It just depends on what is most comfortable for you.
Get yourself and your baby in a relaxed position before you start feeding.
Pay attention to how your breasts feel when your baby latches on.

How do I know I have my baby in the best position? Your baby's gums should bypass the base of the nipple and take in at least a one-inch of the areola as they latch on.
If baby is sucking on only the nipple, your nipples will be sore after just one or two feeding, and may get cracked. This is really painful, I am speaking from experience.
Another reason it is so important that baby compresses the areola is that the reservoirs(called sinuses) for milk are located beneath the areola.
If these sinuses are not compressed,your baby will not get enough milk.
Babies should suck areolas,not nipples.Very important.
If latching on hurts, remove baby from your breast by gently inserting your little finger between your baby's gums and your nipple and try again. Do not yank the breast out by force.

Above all, if initially it seems like its not working, do not panic or get discouraged. Plenty of mums have to practice and persevere until they get the hang of it.

As long as you're healthy, there's not much more you can do to prepare your body for breastfeeding. But you can prepare your mind.

What was your experience like ? Was it easy for you to get into breastfeeding Any more tips you can share ?...…

Is it time ?

I used to believe our local home movies when they are showing a woman in labor, till I had my own experience.

At least my own episode did not start with me screaming and holding my waist, while my husband frantically searching for the car keys, everybody running up and down and all the funny acts usually shown.

Every expectant Mama keeps wondering , how will I know when I am in labor ? Except you have a scheduled and planned  Cesarean Section (CS), like I did for my second pregnancy.

When we get to the last month of pregnancy, a lot of women get anxious, they want the baby to come immediately. It's always the hardest stage. And you can't be blamed because you have been through a lot and just want to get it over with ! hahaha

Some are anxious to meet their bundle of joy ,while a lot are just afraid of the process of child birth and can't wait to have it done with especially for first time Mums. I was a mixture of both feelings.

Well, again every woman's labor is different. So pinpointing when yours begins can be a bit tricky.

Labor is more of a process than a single event, when a number of changes in your body work together to help you to give birth..

However some common signs of the start of labor may include :

•Persistent lower back pain or abdominal pain, with a pre-menstrual feeling and cramps.

•Painful contractions that occur at regular and increasingly shorter intervals, becoming longer and stronger in intensity

•Broken waters. Your membranes may rupture with a gush or a trickle of amniotic fluid. Either way, call your maternity unit to let them know, or head straight to the hospital.

• Show :A brownish or blood-tinged mucus discharge (called show). If you pass the mucus plug that blocks the cervix, labor could be imminent,

•Disrupted sleep

Of course by now your bag(s) are packed and ready. I hope !

Its always best to get to the hospital if you have any of these symptoms so you can be checked . Its better to be sure you are okay and probably sent back home , than to get yourself into an emergency .

Except your hospital is a walking distance from your house or office. You should not take a risk especially if you live in a place where the traffic can be  unpredictable.

Bringing a baby into the world is an amazing achievement. But it's hard work, and it's natural to be nervous when you're not sure what to expect. 

In all these, please try very well to follow the instructions of the nurses and Doctors ,to make things a bit easy for everybody.

As labor progresses, complications may come in which may require that you have your baby by a Caesarean section, do not panic or try to resist.

Sadly lot of women have lost their babies or even their lives due to the mindset very common in my country Nigeria that a Caesarean birth is a sign that you are a weak woman and so  should be avoided at all costs. Its totally untrue. Labor is not a time to show your strength please .  Remember, the most important thing is a healthy Mama and Baby to make the joy complete. So listen to the people attending to you and follow their instructions and advice.

Confused about what to pack in your hospital bag ?

Request from your hospital to give you a list or guide , but most common items include :

1.For the mother

• Pajamas or nightgown
• Nursing Bras
• Post partum Sanitary pads 
• Underwear
• Toiletries
• A nice going home outfit
• Towel

2.For the baby

• Warm clothing
• Shawl
• Socks
• Caps
• Mittens (hand gloves)
• Towels
• Toiletries

This is just a guide ,I am sure the list from your hospital will have lots more .

Congratulations ! You did it !

On a journey !

Let's talk about the 3 trimesters of pregnancy ,and some of the very common things experienced by women.

Remember, Just as each woman is different, so is each pregnancy.

Remember also that 4 weeks make a month , so do not be confused when counting. Pregnancy is measured in weeks.

First Trimester (Week 1 -12)(Early pregnancy )

During the first trimester your body will undergo many changes.

Hormonal changes will affect almost every organ and system in your body. These changes trigger symptoms even in the very first weeks of pregnancy. If you have a regular menstrual cycle,missing your period is usually the first sign that you are pregnant. Other changes may include:

• Extreme tiredness
• Tender, swollen breasts. Your nipples might also stick out.
• Upset stomach with or without throwing up(morning sickness)
• Cravings or distaste for certain foods
• Mood swings
• Constipation (trouble having bowel movements)
• Need to pass urine more often
• Headache
• Heartburn
• Weight gain or loss

As your body changes, you may need to make changes to your daily routine, such as going to bed earlier or eating frequent, small meals. Fortunately, most of these discomforts go away as your pregnancy progresses. As a matter of fact I woke up one morning and I felt so different ,I actually went to check if I was still pregnant. I did another home pregnancy test just to confirm hahahaha....

Some women might not feel any discomfort at all! Very lucky I say.

If you have been pregnant before, you might also feel differently this time around.

Second Trimester (Weeks 13-28) (Mid pregnancy)

A lot of women, like me found this stage much easier than the first .The nausea disappears as well as the tiredness.

But other new, more noticeable changes to your body are now happening. Most visible being that your abdomen will start expanding as the baby continues to grow. Before this trimester is over, you will feel your baby beginning to move!

The first stirrings of the baby is called quickening and is a very powerful moment .

Finally you now know that yes , this is real !

So, as your body makes changes for the growing baby , you may feel the following :

• Body aches, such as back, abdomen, groin, or thigh pain.

• Stretch marks on your abdomen, breasts, thighs, or buttocks
• Darkening of the skin around your nipples
• A line on the skin running from belly button to pubic hairline
• Patches of darker skin, usually over the cheeks, forehead, nose, or upper lip. Patches often match on both sides of the face.
• Itching on the abdomen, palms, and soles of the feet.
• Swelling of the ankles, fingers, and face. (Please If you notice any sudden or extreme swelling or if you gain a lot of weight really quickly, it is advisable to see your doctor right away. (This could be a sign of preeclampsia that is high blood pressure in pregnancy)

Third Trimester (Weeks 29-40) (Late pregnancy)

Hey ! This is the last lap of the journey !

Some of the things you experienced in the second trimester will continue .

Plus, many women find breathing difficult and notice they have to go to the bathroom even more often. This is because the baby is getting bigger and is putting more pressure on your bladder. There is no cause for alarm.

You will also experience new things such as :

• Shortness of breath
• Heartburn
• Swelling of the ankles, fingers, and face. (If you notice any sudden or extreme swelling or if you gain a lot of weight really quickly, call your doctor right away. This could be a sign of preeclampsia.)
• Tender breasts, which may leak a watery pre-milk called colostrum Your belly button may stick out.
• Trouble sleeping
• The baby "dropping," or moving lower in your abdomen
• Contractions, which can be a sign of real or false labor 

You should also have your hospital bag prepared at this stage and ready. 

Get a list of required items for both you and  baby from your hospital to guide you. 

Let everyone in your household know where the bag is please ! You never know.

Get excited ! this is the final countdown !


Tell me how you felt in this last trimester please ….

Some quick pregnancy facts

• A normal pregnancy lasts about 40 weeks and is divided into three periods. each period is called a Trimester

       First Trimester - from week 1 - weeks 12       

       Second trimester- from weeks 13 - weeks 28

       Third trimester- from weeks 29- weeks 40 

Very common Symptoms of early pregnancy include : 

• The absence of your menstrual period, 
• Breast changes, tiredness, nausea, mood swings, or other symptoms. Now these symptoms vary. 
• Some women, I would call lucky as they hardly experience any of these symptoms, while on the other hand some experience severe symptoms and may even end up hospitalized for some time.
• As the  pregnancy progresses there may be heartburn, difficulty sleeping, swelling of the ankles or fingers, hemorrhoids, and mild contractions.
• By the end of 37 weeks, a baby is considered full term and its organs are ready to function on their own.
• As your due date gets closer, your baby may turn into a head-down position for birth. Most babies "present" head down.
• Babies at birth typically weigh between 2.7kg and 4kg and are 19 to 21 inches long. Most full-term babies fall within these ranges.

The journey begins

Now that you have confirmed that you are pregnant , what next ?

Well, you celebrate with your spouse, share the good news with family and friends, and then....it is time to get yourself registered with a hospital.

It is usually advisable to register early enough, within the first three months .This will help to detect any issues that may pose a challenge to the well being of the mother and child. It is best to register at 8 weeks after the second missed period.

Most women are ignorant of this and so defer registering for antenatal care till the pregnancy is a bit advanced. They believe that there are no advantages in registering for antenatal or seeing a gynecologist in the first three months.
Please be aware that early commencement of antenatal care by pregnant women as well as regular visits have the potential to affect mother and child positively.

Now, when you pay a visit to your doctor, there are tests that you will be asked to perform. Some tests are done periodically while some are done every time you visit the doctor or midwife.

Some of the routine tests include:

•  Weight - Your doctor/midwife should be watching carefully for a sudden weight gain, which, combined with excessive swelling, could mean trouble. She will also take note if you aren't gaining enough weight, which could be dangerous for the developing baby. This is not the time to eat for two, as pregnant women are usually advised. Just ensure you eat healthy and regular meals.

•    Blood pressure -This must be tested at every visit to the clinic.it is very important. If your blood pressure is not regularly monitored , please bring this to the attention of your doctor. The first blood pressure test taken at your first visit  will be used  as a base to compare with all the others every month. A sudden rise in blood pressure  is a warning for a problem such as preeclampsia--a high-tech word for high blood pressure during pregnancy.

•   Urine Tests- This should also be done regularly, The nurses will give you a little paper strip    with some colors on them and ask you to pass your urine on it. They watch the color changes and this determines if there is a problem or not. Urine is tested for three things; presence of infection, protein,  which can be a sign of high blood pressure; and sugar, which can be a sign of diabetes.

Blood tests
A blood test is usually done during your first visit.
If your doctor doesn't already know the details about your blood, he or she will draw some blood early in the pregnancy.
The blood will be taken from a vein on the inside bend of your elbow. This blood will tell a lot about…

• Your blood group:  A, B, or O. This information is important in case a blood transfusion ever necessary.
• Your rhesus (Rh) blood group: Your Rh factor may be negative or positive. The difference means nothing unless you are negative and the baby's father is positive. In this case, your baby may be incompatible with your rhesus blood group, which can cause problems with future pregnancies. Knowing your blood type in advance lets your doctor prevent any trouble from occurring.
•  Hemoglobin levels. Hemoglobin keeps red cells filled with oxygen. Hemoglobin levels often fall during pregnancy, causing anemia; your doctor will  want to make sure your levels don't go too low.
•  STDs: Because sexually transmitted diseases can cause many problems for the developing baby, your blood will be tested for Hepatitis B, HIV, and Syphilis.

It is also very important to have an ultrasound scan done to confirm the well being of the baby.
The early ultrasound scan apart from confirmation of the pregnancy is very useful for accurate dating of the pregnancy. Late scans are not as accurate.

I am sure by now you agree with me that registering early for antenatal care and more importantly going for your regular visits is really important. Some hospitals actually organize classes where they teach pregnant women a lot of things to expect as well as things to look out for .
The expectant mothers also get the chance to ask lots of questions. (I used to be too shy back then to ask questions especially with my first pregnancy .)
Take advantage of the classes if your hospital offers this.

There are lots of materials available too for regular studying , however, most importantly always refer to your doctor to clarify any concerns or to seek for information . Very important.

Don't go on this journey alone....